Homesick

I'm homesick. For the first time that home is in Timberon, New Mexico. All of our physical possessions are loaded on a trailer. Well actually Jeremy is still trying to reorganize some of it to fit securely for the long haul. But, our first home is empty. If we hadn't had a deadline with Freddie Mac of 3pm yesterday to get out, I may have had time to get sappy about it. I did for maybe 5 seconds picking up our dogs and cats and pulling out of the driveway. I had a good 5 seconds of ugly cry before I turned it off so I could drive back to my 17 month old, very consumed with Mommy at the moment, toddler. I cried a tear for the first time we slept there feeling oh so accomplished as young adults. A tear for getting through the house fire and rebuilding it just how we wanted. A tear for bringing our first born home and watching him happy and giggling through all the wonderful stages of the first year. His first words were spoke in that home. The first time he said Mama was in that home.

But the happiness and loving memories I have of that home are only held within its walls. It served us well, but that's the thing about reality. Location, location, location! The neighbors will be dearly missed. Well, only 2 households on our street really. Not the house that had the drive-by shooting for sure. Those 7 gun shots rang a very loud wake-up call at 2 am 2 years ago. It's just taken us a while to finally get out. And out we are!



It seems like each breath I take is a sigh of relief right now. It was a daunting task just getting this far. Both Jeremy and myself were at wits end, completely overwhelmed with the seemingly endless amount of stuff in that home! Much was thrown away. Or given away. Many times words were flung about as we tried to muck our way through the last few hours. Sweaty and exhausted; desperate. It definitely didn't help that Auggie was there the entire time. He didn't understand why all his things were gone, but he watched movie after movie and was relatively good until the TV was packed up. Then all bets were off. I had to hold him, chase him, everything short of lock him in the dog kennel with the cats (well, he actually spent some time in the empty dog kennel on his own accord). Jeremy had to take the brunt of the work because of the pregnancy and he was a champion about it. Not to say there weren't several times we wanted to throw things at one another. But it's DONE. Thank you 8lb 5oz baby Jesus, its DONE!

Now we are staying at Jeremy's parent's home so he can finish a few jobs before me make the long haul. I'm ok with that. I'm so glad we didn't have to drive 14 hours after all that mess yesterday. (Harvey and Liz you're champions for doing that!) Yeesh. But my heart is hurting to be home. To start building memories as we finish building our home just in the nick of time before it's too cold. But by God we will have it done! By the hair of our chinny chin chins we'll be in our new home just in time to snuggle up for the winter and get our plans and affairs in order for the coming year. Just in time to enjoy Auggie's first snow ball fight, first crunchy walk in the snow, first sled ride, first hot cocoa... I cannot wait.

Years ago I was worried about moving to such a secluded place. I had no friends there. No family. How can you get by with no moral support from loved ones? But this question too was answered almost as quickly as I had asked. Jeremy's parents have always wanted to move there eventually and are nearing that goal. My brother fell in love with the mountains on a trip one year with us. He vowed to live there too. Awesome! That's one more down. Then after hearing of our plans to move, and of course after a trip there for thanksgiving where she fell in love with those vast, calm, awing views, my mother said one day  "Wait a minute, so let me get this right. Your brother is going to move there, You guys want to move there, which means my grand babies will be there......Well, we should too!" A few months later they found the perfect place and will eventually move but will frequently visit. Then my brother fell fast and furiously in love with the most wonderful woman I could have hoped for and she too fell just as quickly for Timberon. They beat us there with their new little bundle of joy by a few weeks. But I'm so glad we were able to share this place with them. All of them.

Then of course there is the locals. Everyone I seem to meet I like. Jeremy already has several very good friends and I definitely approve! Finally a place with "our kind of people"! People that don't look at us cross eyed when we talk about frivolous society and the need to get back to the basics. These people just get us! It's wonderful! We've been welcomed with open arms by most (of course there are a few nay-sayers asking why they "Keep getting all these displaced Texans") But I expect as soon as they need a hard worker that can weld and fabricate anything imaginable and taste my homemade cookies, they'll be won over like the rest. ;)

It feels good. We're finally on the right path. We're finally, almost, out of Houston. We're starting on a clean slate and have all the faith in the world that it will be as beautiful as we dreamed. It feels REAL good. :)